Meditations on Meditation

I’ve been trying to learn to meditate for a few weeks now. “Trying” in this context covers: actually meditating twice for about fifteen minutes, skimming over posts about meditation, and checking Tumblr for most of the night while mentally complaining that I really have no time to meditate.

I seem to have the general idea down– sit very still, focus on the breathing, develop slight vertigo as you lose track of how long your limbs are and whether you’re sitting upright or leaning over your lap at a forty-five degree angle, etc. The hardest part for me is once I feel like I’ve got the rhythm down, there’s this sense of, “okay, now what?”

Which, as I understand it, is the point of meditation. There is no “now what”. So I continue to sit patiently and wait for the timer to run out and try not to follow any one train of thought more than a few railroad ties. My brain treats it like a miniature sleep session, pulling out random crap that’s been floating around and trying to sort through it. I do my best to let the thoughts float by and not start actively thinking about anything.

Some people have suggested active meditations, with movement or prayer beads or something, and I like that idea. I’m just not sure if I won’t get completely distracted by whatever else I’m doing and forget to meditate. I suppose it would help if there were some sort of light or bell that would go off to indicate that you are successfully meditating.

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Frigga devotee, Dedicant of Ar nDraiocht Fein

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